I just read some of my old blog post and I am taken back. I can really see how far we have come on our cancer journey. It is funny, I really don’t think to much about how sick Mallorie has been, but when I see a photo or read a post from the past ~ the very emotion I felt when I wrote it crawls back into my soul.
I am thankful I chose to capture my emotions, fears, frustrations, wins and successes through this season in life. And there are a ton of post in my drafts folder I have never finished or posted. Looking back, I wonder why I never completed them? Mallorie will be having her one year anniversary in December. I can’t believe it is so close. Time really does fly by. I remember how active she was before she got cancer. She was always on the go. Then when she started showing signs of the illness, she slowed down a bit. But if you were to look at her, you would have never guessed she was sick. Then we were informed she had leukemia. It was like the cancer was eating her. She became weak and fragile. No more running, jumping, or laughing. I remember thinking it would always be like this.
Now, almost one year later, I see the light at the end of the tunnel. She is getting stronger every day. She is on the go all the time, feeling good. She has started talking about playing sports again. I am excited but scared at the same time. I think I am afraid she could get sick again. I know I can’t live in fear, but in the back of my mind I think about the cancer returning.
I would never wish this disease on anyone. And after reflexing on my past entries, I know I am much stronger.